... down a hole.

 
 
Picture
 The news that Goldman Sachs is seeking a few good-looking, ethnically-diverse interns to compete in its increasingly public S.M.U.G. program (Specious Megalomaniacs Undermining Government) has would-be Cinderellas buying up Blankfein bars like they're running out of milk & honey.

If you’re hungry for wealth, power & status, yet more aesthetically suited for the moral façade of public service, the Goldman Sachs' S.M.U.G. program may be the golden ticket you’ve been looking for.

Since America’s first pigmented president found a winning ticket and the top spot at Goldman's biggest candy factory, S.M.U.G. recruiters have enjoyed a tidal wave of interest from the overachieving underclasses. 

Unfortunately, the program only takes the most comprehensively census-baffling & small-handed to fill its high-powered positions, so there’s no need for the grab-happy or marginally purebred to get their hope on.

“We're not trying to be ironically inclusive, like a P. Diddy White Party,  we're not in retail for Christ's sake, but these are media-driven times, the propaganda is Unforgivable, sure, but it makes shit smell sweet, lets be honest.  The face of an organization like ours has to be as diverse as a T-mobile ad, as green as a fair trade banana and elusive like the Easter bunny.  Besides, doing God’s work is a lot easier when your dick's dipped in sugar, capiche?”  – Lloyd Blankfein

The S.M.U.G. alums of old no doubt recall when the program was more secretive & ruthlessly excluding, nevertheless, they always seem ready to sing praise for the golden ticket,

“I thought life had peaked in Ivy League, seriously, listen to me.  Haze, hazing mine, minority students desperate to join the, uh, the rank n' file of American power brokers seemed to be as good as it got.  Coming up in the 70s, dream, dreaming of exploiting good-looking lobbyists from the NAACP was a groovy acid trip, it just wasn't real enough.  When G, G.W. arrived, jib-jabbering with a chocolate dipped staff,  I knew there was a golden ticket in there for me, too.  When Goldman finally propped my stuttering ass up at the helm of the devil's delight, uh, the treasury, and I got to dip my dick in a giant vat, vat of melted, chocolate souls, just like Lloyd promised.  Saying the harvest of the American sweet-dream machine has been bountiful is the un, understatement of the century.” – Henry Paulson

If you enjoy insensitive sensibilities, please check out the new Robbin' Hood t-shirt.  It's Ben Bernanke in his early 20s, back when he was "straight up robbin' fools," long before peer pressure made him get "a real job."  A great look for the activist or ironic financier  looking for laughs at the next uptown shindig.

 


Comments

D.C.

Mon, 12 Apr 2010 01:43:39

That's deep. Deep in the cut.

 

Megatron

Mon, 12 Apr 2010 13:05:03

If you're up to what I think you are--it being hard to tell because you're so grossly verbose ;P--well, it should be pretty funny, das all I'm sayin' bout dat.

 

ben

Fri, 16 Apr 2010 08:25:53

looooooolz:

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2010/04/15/bloomberg1376-L0Z65M07SXKX-1.DTL

 

bb

Sun, 02 May 2010 20:43:03

mkt's in correction mode, repeating pullback pattern of Jan 2010, might even be wave A of elliot wave pattern. hmmm.. i'm in for some FAZ calls just in case. watch FAZ pop next week, it's breaking out. i was in FAZ calls prior to April 16, sold on that day, and then also prior to April 27th, sold on that day, but big money-losing mistake was in re-buying 3X bear ETFs after selling those. oh well. this time no hesitation to ride out those $11 FAZ calls until FAZ hits $13ish, which is what i'm betting on.
look at AIG chart pattern set up April 26th to April 27th, dropped for a clean pop of +700% in calls. i've committed that chart pattern to the forefront of my daily conscious memories, seriously pissed off for missing that drop. oh well.

my hypothesis is that not many people will buy your bernanke shirt (by "not many people" i mean <25).

 

JP

Tue, 04 May 2010 09:14:00

Whether conscious or subconscious reasoning has led you to such a hypothesis, I'm inclined to agree with it.

 

bb

Tue, 04 May 2010 11:25:31

apriori or intuitive reasoning cannot in every instance replace experimentation in the real world, for the randomness in the real world may surprise our expectations, thus the need to test hypotheses.

the market's tanking, and my FAZ calls are up, sold them for a tiny gain because i thought there'd be a rebound in the afternoon, sold too early as always, oh well, can't be perfect, but the idea is to tend towards perfection as time t increases. would've made much more on VIX calls though, oh well, next time i think there's going to be massive fear and trend reversal, i'll pick up VIX calls instead, lots more action, it's been up like 20% the days that my baby FAZ was only up 6% to 8%.

 

bb

Thu, 13 May 2010 01:30:31

hokay, so i have been thinking about trends, for philosophical and practical matters, and with regard to your site(s), perhaps the best strategy is to (1) stay relevant AND (2) provide real value (e.g. information or meaningful, useful analysis). i don't think trying to jack traffic through domain name and SEO is effective in the long-term, maybe it might yield tiny little measurable results in the form of, say, ad-revenue pennies and dollars, but that effect, even if arises, may not be sustainable unless you provide (1) and (2). look at zerohedge.com, it's pretty popular and gained readers over time because it (1) stays relevant and (2) provides value in the form of information AND information analysis/explanation.

what the hell does all of this mean? what am i babbling about this time? well, okay, i am at some public lounge right now and CNN is playing in the background, so i will use their news report on this matter (http://www.ktvu.com/news/23470391/detail.html) as an example of something that you COULD be brainboogering about to (1) stay relevant and (2) provide value to users by writing some sort of analysis.

one view is that we're currently undergoing information overload, so while it may NOT add additional value to just BLOG or "re-blog" about current events, it may attract readers if you provided some sort of opinionated (or unopinionated) analysis of trending events.

sorry to have to post this publically here on your site but the thought just came to mind and i am on a public computer so i do not want to use email.

what's the attractive point and power of twitter, and why does it attract users? relevance, things, thoughts, happening in real-time. people (and companies, and search engines), want to know what is currently "trending" and that's why twitter gets to survive in the dotcom game.

yes yes, i am not currently a doer and have not tested my own sites yet to full fruition, so all of this is merely conjecture. no one's going to give a damn about a site if it fails (1) and (2), and this is what i've realized after recently using and making daily visits to zerohedge. it's useful, the writing is entertaining and non-dry, non-academic, not-opaque or vague, just real, no-nonsense stuff, and maybe that's also why people like reggie middleton's blog as well.

 

bb

Thu, 13 May 2010 01:36:20

i forgot to add in the 3rd paragraph above that people genuinely value and want to make sense of our increasingly complex world. they just don't know what to think anymore because there's so much empty chatter and so much information, and this uncertainty results in the lack of confidence to make decisions (this is the reason why i failed to hold my FAZ calls going into May 6th-7th: lack of confidence). i think this desire for understanding and analysis is the reason why Cramer has an audience and a following, even though the data shows that he's wrong most of the time: people want answers, want confidence, want a leader. if you can provide that in blog-form, it'll only raise the likelihood of you actually gaining and increasing sustainable traffic, as opposed to playing the SEO gamble.

 

bb

Wed, 26 May 2010 19:54:16

i agree with you 100% now: this bloated POS called the USA needs to suffer a second Great Depression, our fellow citizens take everything for granted, and are completely worthless in terms of real skills, relative to other people in other nations (myself included).

i'm saying that as a person who is pretty patriotic and loves the U.S. of A.

but things are just a JOKE now. we need to suffer, to feel pain, to finally appreciate things.

let it burn, and rise from the ashes.

the gov't keeps trying to prop things up, messing with nature, trying to preserve our "comfortable way of life"

 

JPF

Thu, 27 May 2010 10:25:34

Did you read The Black Swan?

 

JPF

Thu, 27 May 2010 11:33:40

Yes. If we cannot feed, clothe, shelter and protect ourselves without money as the intermediary, our skills are sorely lacking, a deficit that will ultimately turn to downfall. The Renaissance man is the opposite of the Modern Man. The MM is a one trick pony; a cog in an interdependent network of specialists.

Specialization has drawn us away from our independent agrarian roots and into an industrial complex, it has expanded our economies and incentivized our prowess, it has made a spectacle of creativity and securitized our vulnerabilities. But our system relies on an absolute: an absolute faith in money.
Money is intrinsically worthless, yet most of us are obsessed with making it; the bankers, clamoring over one another for opulent, free-living, have infected society with their loose virtue, wayward aims and zero-sum lifestyles. There is no free-living in nature, no "retirement".
A squirrel works hard to achieve a surplus of nuts for the coming winter. He cannot achieve more than his own efforts provide, however. Even in partnership with other squirrels he may only achieve more if his efforts yield less than the efforts of others, a welfare state.
What if squirrels invent robot squirrels, technology, may he then escape his indebtedness to nature? Sure. “Financially independence” is ubiquitously confused with independence from nature. The best and brightest within civilization have been led astray, clamoring for a financial independence that will never come, limiting their REAL abilities to abstract notions of debt and interest, sharpening their skill for robbing Peter to pay Paul.

Unfortunately, capable minds have been tricked into believing a money economy is a sustainable system, producing technology as an aside to conspicuous, market driven consumerism. But we are competing for the prestige of captaining of a sinking ship. We must direct our efforts toward technological planning and achievement, not flavored lattes and expanding the menu at McDonalds.

No one man, or group of men, can control humanity forever. It will reset. The question is, how much blood will be shed and will we be in the group that survives it?

 

bb

Thu, 27 May 2010 11:34:57

yeah, cover to cover, i finally finished it last week (the library kept recalling it because others requested it) and it basically completely changed the way i think and see things now. i know i'm 3 years late reading it, but oh well, "better late than never". there's a new paperback version coming out. i follow Taleb's tweets too, some nice gems of wisdom there.

i'm now just starting Fooled by Randomness

check dis out: http://37signals.com/svn/posts/2358-this-is-not-content

apparently Obamanomics isn't working out quite so well as the Harvard economists projected (e.g. they had to extend that free $8,000 new home buyer stimulus to April 2010), so now there's news here and there on various independent sources that some nuke submarines are cruising on over to the Persian Gulf? not sure how dependable this is, i don't have a tv so i haven't caught any news from mainstream sources about this:

http://www.debka.com/article/8812/

heh, maybe if one N.Korean shoots a spitball over at the South, rules of engagement will justify some sort of crazy all out escalation of war.

next shoe to drop is consumer credit, further weakening in housing market, more and more signs that there's no real recovery after stimulus is pulled. it too many many many little optimistic events to push the markets up to that April 2010 high, but only one or a few small unpredictable severe events to drop it.

i'm getting destroyed in NFLX puts right now, that i foolishly bought too high, currently down like $2500.............i was UP $2000 last week too. still holding. something's not right, the CEO's selling shares in 10,000 blocks weekly.

the market giveth and the market taketh away.

yesterday the indexes move red on news China is shying away from EU, then today we move green on news that that news was false. hmmmm...

something ain't right my friend, something, ain't....right...

rationality is somewhat predictable, but irrationality is completely unpredictable, especially by those not watching out for it.

i've been checking out some of Martin Armstrong's articles, not sure if it was you who mentioned it, but he basically thinks we're in a 1932 situation where the market rallied after the 1929 crash, but then crashed even further below that 1929 level. he calls it a waterfall event, happened Oct 2008, then a mini-waterfall event on May 6th-7th. 2011 is his target date for all out depression to take place. i think he gets out of prison in 2011 too, not sure, i can't find much info on when his sentence is up.

here you go:
https://docs.google.com/fileview?id=0B7ifjZg7kfewYjAzNjRhNmEtM2FiYi00MGFjLWJkZDctMDA5OTlhODU3M2Fm&hl=en

 

bb

Thu, 27 May 2010 12:32:15

good thoughts, thanks for the reply.

yes, it's just like we discussed, things are out of balance, nature is out of balance, and those who are benefiting from the imbalance are trying to perpetuate it, but ironically their interference has just made it worse and worse. the larger and larger the imbalance, the worse the downside will be when nature rebalances.

we can clearly see the policy attempts by the Obama/Geithner/Bernanke team focus ONLY on preserving the system that broke, that didn't work, by various cosmetic, tangential solutions that treat the wounds, the immediate symptoms, but not the underlying disease, the causes. it's all going downhill from here. i believe with 100% confidence that there will be a collapse in 2010-2011, though i know not how severe it will be, but the direction is clearly down, especially once ARMs readjust and rates, foreclosures, house inventories, rise.

it's going to be comedic as hell when things "suddenly" drop.

war with Iran or N.Korea will be what "pulls" the economy out of depression.

 

JPF

Thu, 27 May 2010 17:45:32

On imbalance - yes, so true, here is a great explanation of the mathematic underlying your intuition...
http://market-ticker.denninger.net/archives/712-The-Price-of-Capitalism.html


Coupled with this makes an interesting realization:
http://247wallst.com/2007/03/08/why_trading_is_/

That capital cannot, over the long haul, arbitrage risk with higher interest, e.g., the capital market as a whole cannot beat "organic economic growth," capitalists that manage a lower default rate at higher interest premiums, "beating" the market, are simply "capturing the capital" of those failing at such an endeavour. Thus, charging higher interest for "higher risk" does nothing, on average to prohibit regression to the mean. Interesting stuff indeed.

So, the riskiest trading idea, and the most profitable if we desire to be the best players at the table, beating the averages by usurping capital from our fellow traders, is to make correct, highly levered and timely bets on black swan events, e.g., the collapse of deferred debt markets, i.e., where is the next debt bubble, when is it likely to implode, and how do we leverage a short...

 

bb

Thu, 27 May 2010 20:52:00

complementarity reasoning:

in times of peace and prosperity, benefits of living in cities outweigh the costs, relative to living in the peaceful, isolated woods/countryside. thus, better to live in cities to be exposed to the wealth-creating activity.

in times of war and scarcity, costs of living in cities HUGELY outweigh the benefits (crowding, scarcity of food, water, high crime rate, targets for bombing, rioting), relative to living in the peaceful isolated woods/countryside. thus, best to live in woods/countryside.

inspired by Marc Faber's latest views:
http://www.stevequayle.com/News.alert/10_Money/100527.Farber.html

 

b

Sat, 29 May 2010 21:48:32

the war on work, the anti-work mentality in the U.S.:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-udsIV4Hmc&feature=related

 

JPF

Sun, 30 May 2010 13:06:43

Awesome clip. Gotta love fora.tv

 

bb

Tue, 01 Jun 2010 14:58:59

what made the big impact to me from that Mike Rowe talk was near the end, when he pointed out why the U.S. is in trouble: we focus so much, perhaps even entirely, on INNOVATION (the creation of new products & services), and not enough on imitation (the process of producing, reproducing products through real manufacturing).

so Apple makes the iPad, then ships off the information to China or wherever to do the imitative, repetitive work of putting it together, the consumer here in the U.S. pays $500-$700 for it at an Apple store, either from income or on credit, the Apple store salesfolk/retail-drones get paid, Apple gets profits, the consumer gets iPad but reduces in money savings or increases in debt, the foreign manufacturer gets paid, holds more dollars, increases in wealth, the workers over there get paid (though very little), and the imbalance continues.

it's not that we'd all be better off being "PROTECTIONIST", but there's something about this system that is not sustainable or self-sustaining. it will break. the rate of debt increase and growth increase is vastly outpacing the rate of growth in consumer strength, if that consumer strength tops off or declines, everything tanks with it, just like in 2008-2009.

apparently this guy thinks the S&P 500 will do a head & shoulders and then take a high dive:

http://www.kitco.com/ind/maund/may312010.html

or maybe he's just drawing a bunch of meaningless lines on a random, unpredictable pattern.

i don't know, with tensions between Israel and the pro-Palestine sides heating up, the drop may happen sooner.
i personally don't think there's enough to drive a right shoulder pop before the drop. after today's drop going into close, it looks like weakness and fear are still dominating.

 

Thu, 08 Jul 2010 07:49:08

As a paranoid & prudent investor, the only stocks I feel safe owning are the so called "sin" stocks such as gambling, alcohol, tobacco, and guns. Of course, load up on gold too, and don't listen to bogus advice about the "gold bubble" which the banking industry wants us to believe. I am just using a primitive buy and hold strategy, and I've done alright with my sin stocks. Certainly I am not rich, but I haven't lost my ass, and the dividends keep coming every quarter.

 



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